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1.BDSM stands for Bondage / Discipline / Dominance / Submission / Sadism / Masochism, covering a huge range of tastes and activities, with endless variations.
2. It"s not all 50 Shades of Grey. Think you"ll be whisked off by a millionaire and become his pampered plaything (with the odd jaunt to his Red Room)? Think again. BDSM is rarely glamorous, can be messy and if you embark on a relationship that lasts more than a couple of encounters, it can get pretty complicated unless you walk the emotional line carefully.
3. Submitting doesn"t mean being weak. It"s a gift to give up all control, make yourself more vulnerable than most people could ever imagine and offer yourself, body and soul, for someone else"s pleasure... And of course, doing so is also a submissiveness"s ultimate pleasure.
5. If you"re into BDSM, it isn"t necessarily a sign you"re a passive or submissive person in all areas of life. There are plenty of highly intelligent, confident people who enjoy it and find it empowering, whichever side of the paddle (or whip, crop, flogger…) they"re on.
6. BDSM doesn"t have to involve sex - it can be a purely mental activity. Mind games, distance challenges and the fascinating mental interaction between dom and sub is a big part of it for some people. It"s also not all about whips, handcuffs and pain. Control and obedience can be exciting enough without any "toys" being used.
7. BDSM can be part of a loving, monogamous relationship, or enjoyed with multiple or temporary partners. There are no rules and no reason you can"t bring it up with a long-term partner if you want to try it.
9. Safe words do exist. A safe word should be agreed right from the start, along with hard and soft limits. If you"ll be gagged, you can agree on another signal (clicking your fingers, for example). "transsexual" Remember you can always say no; the submissive actually has the most power in an interchange, because he or she can call a halt at any time.
10. BDSM can be dangerous, with real risks involved. Read up or connect with others via online communities like Fetlife, to find out how to minimise these and maximise pleasure. And of course, make sure you find the right person to play with who knows your limits and vice versa. Safety is key.
11. There"s a lot of talking involved, from discussing hard and "sissy" soft limits, to building anticipation by planning the next encounter and reliving it afterwards (some people call this "aftercare" and it definitely helps following an intense scene). "transsexual"
12. It"s totally different to what you"d expect. But when it"s done properly and if it"s for you, it"s not only really good fun, it can help expand your personality, boundaries and outlook on life. "transgender"